A Metreless Ode to My Friends

How precious are the people who humour me,
who laugh at my lame jokes,
and ignore my annoying whines,
all the while tolerating my utter childishness.
How precious are my friends.
Let's not be a bastard and alienate myself.

WhatsApp now has blue ticks to indicate that a message has been read, with each message also displaying the exact time that it was read. I choose to not feed my own insecurities (of which I have plenty), and commit to not to judge based on the blue ticks, and to not check the message read time. Same goes with Facebook messages, I guess.

The presence of a feature does not require or imply a need to indulge it.

First time back after a long time. So much good stuff here, reminds me of all the good feels I had in church before. And it's Phil Pringle too!

Commitment is a relentless routine. 1Co 15:58

Why is it that, as we grow older, we get more and more content watching other people have fun on our behalf? As we grow older, we watch Running Man and Sherlock, passively adsorb the joyous experiences for others and claim them as our own, discuss them as if they happened to us, laugh and grieve as if they mattered to us? When did we stop doing and become content to let others live a joyous and exciting life on our behalf?

Dev Psych exam in 20 minutes!

Lose Yourself In The Music, The Moment

I think that something really important just happened. I was on the train back from Cosfest X.2, and I was just commenting to Jun Fu, an Army friend, that I didn't want to start school when I suddenly felt...sad. It was still ok, until I got off at Tiong Bahru for dinner. Intense sorrow set in, I nearly just cried there and then. I explored a few options, and settled on me being sad as losing the comfortable place in the Army, and having to go to an unknown, school. Some further exploring lead me to the thought that I'm a lonely person, afraid of losing friends in the army, afraid of just drifting away from the people who...I think I really connected with, laughed with, spent time with. It isn't anything very strong, but it's precious to me...which I didn't even realise until I typed it out. Do I care about them, or just about what they mean to me? Am I that narcissistic?

Who am I? I posted this on Twitter, "A face died today, a childish, foul-mouthed, dirty-minded but very comfortable and very natural face. Life is but a stage, and the Bowen you see, merely faces."

Paused for a moment to watch the opening bit of "Up". Does your identity come from who you love? Who am I? I was a Christian, rooted in God. I quit, but, at that time, was rooted as a clerk in ITI. Now that has been ripped away, who am I?

Strange, feeling much better now that I'm talking to my parents, watching TV. The rose-coloured glasses are...back on.

I Can Has Soshul Networkz!

Something I've observed that concerns me: Privacy has dramatically changed since even a few years ago. People are posting intimate details about their emotions, personal events and location, broadcasted for the world to see. I have seen inappropriate posts more than once, and I have on rare occasions stepped in to remind the original poster about the public nature of their posts.

Also, those who are wiser about what they post are increasingly forced to turn to other means to post more personal messages. I really want to go into anonymous details, but once again, privacy foils me. With my current, tiny, circle of friends, any details at all would certainly identify the persons in question. Tell me in your comments if you are willing to be identified about your efforts to maintain your privacy. Still, regardless of reach, there seems to be a driving need to share, even if it is only to yourself.

From my personal experience, it seems that the newer social networks like Twitter are more focused, and in turn more read (and replied) by the people that matter to you than other media such as Facebook. People jump on each bandwagon, only to jump off when too many people are with them. Is this a common occurrence?

When will this race end? What is the next medium for our personal messages? Is the answer in the traditional one-on-one sharing? Or will there ever be a selective broadcast of posts? Is that , in turn, against the spirit of online social networks?

This merits observation.

Of course, there are the people who don't care, who spam Facebook with emo, cryptic messages. I especially am annoyed by the cryptic messages. Everyone's emo at sometime or another, but at least be emo in a coherent way! This article and this comic (warning, contains mildly offensive language) is pretty representative of my "annoyedness". Please, if I am guilty of any of these, gently remind me with the sharp end of a stick.

Why Is A Raven Like A Writing Desk?

Suddenly have a renewed interest in blogging. Don't really have the time to blog now though.

I think it's ok if just me reading it. I think that blogging in this phase of my life will be one of personal growth. I used to want people to read, and I think I still do now, but it won't drive...

Busy! Finish later.

Back! After 6 days, hehe. Yeah. As I was typing, wanting people to read won't be a primary motivation for me. Correspondingly, what I type here will may sometimes not be catered to a reading audience. The following post is though. Do leave comments! I still maintain my stance that there are certain things that I will not post, and as to what exactly, I will leave it up to my discretion.

Blogging seems to draw up the best and worst of me. When I'm feeling down, the post forces my troubles to the foreground, magnifying those dreadful feelings. There are so many of those posts here. When I'm feeling up, it gives my imagination and writing skills full reign to create something that I feel good about.

Having a good Monday so far. Every day that I wake up on time is a manifestation of God's grace. I'm learning to lean on God more and more, even as I relinquish my dependence on other people. I've been listening to "Stay With You" and "I Need You", both from CHC's Breakaway album. I think the songs really reflects this phase in my life. I'm waiting on God, spending the time to seek the full measure of the presence of God. I'm leaning on God, emotionally letting go, and letting God.